They say that boys are easier than girls. Umm…no…not exactly. When you’re the mom of boys, you come to the shocking realization that you literally speak two different languages. I hate to sound cliché, but boys ARE different than girls…not harder or easier…just different.
I became a single parent when my boys were 8 and 15 years old, and looking back now, my biggest blunder was thinking that I had to be the “Dad” to teach my kids to be good men. What was I thinking? What I took on as my “Dad Persona” had to be tough about virtually EVERYTHING! Say “NO” first, don’t budge no matter what…never let them see you sweat…never give in…ever. It was so exhausting and not exactly the way to build relationships with teenage boys! In hindsight though, helping my boys become good men wasn’t at all about teaching them to be tough, but helping them understand the softer side of life. Every time I tried to enforce the rules and take on my ultra-rigid stance, it only brought greater resistance. Not exactly a favorable pattern to get into, but we survived. And despite all my failings, they turned out to be pretty, darn good men; strong, kind, thoughtful and making their own way in life and I admire that. They are independent thinkers and yet deeply connected to family, friends and their work.
So, all you moms of boys out there, it’s okay not to understand “boy” language because when you trust your gut and follow your heart, the perspective you bring as moms of boys is just exactly what they need…completely.
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